Cry-baby

Well, what can I say? It goes on. And on. And on. I feel like I've been pregnant for 2 years or more. I miss my old self. And I'm scared as hell.
While P is growing more and more into this ( picturing himself and Tiny N watching war movies together, going to the gym together, etc), all I'm thinking is "I can't do this!". And I'm the one who has been dreaming about motherhood for the last 10 years. I feel like one of those people who go completely crazy, and screw up everything, after winning the lottery.
I cry because P's mom tells me to look at baby stuff in the UK.
I cry because the Eurostar guard tells me I can't take my tea through security.
I have even cried with more than one Bones episode (but season 6 was a bit more emotional than usual, wasn't it? Please say "yes").
I tell P 10 times a week how much I love him, because I have this irrational fear that I'm going to loose him once this baby is born.
I spend hours, days, choosing the decoration for the nursery, and then I don't buy it, simply because I get so scared. And, yes, I end up crying again.
Maybe I should talk to my OB, although I feel she never takes anything I say seriously.

On the positive side:
I've slept better the past week. Or maybe I'm just getting used to my 5 AM wake-up calls (= Tiny N's early work-out session).
Our landlord installed a banister - so less chance of me falling down the stairs.
I found a remedy against heartburn that doesn't make me nauseous.
The leg cramps got better (but are not entirely gone).
And still no stretch marks thanks to good old Nivea.